almost 10 pm

Sitting here looking like a homeless girl..pondering why im still single....I whole heartily believe that i choose to be by myself....I have seen so many fucked up relationships and in all honesty i tend to sabotage mine....i always find something wrong and blow it way out of proportion...I have dumped guys for the dumbest shit... I have been through the ringer with guys and i guess now i am doing the old "get them before they get you" thing and its dumb. I want someone, i need physicality and the whole booty call/ friends with benefits thing isnt working for me anymore..im sick of liking unavailable men and Im sick of going to bed alone every night...i miss the closeness of having someone and the sex but most of all i miss the butterflies. Le Sigh